“Do you know," Peter asked, "why swallows build in the eaves of houses? It is to listen to the stories.” ~ J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

10.28.2010

every year i pretend to myself that i'm going to make christmas cards


i never do.  i have the stuff - i have more than i could possibly need, and i have ideas - tons of them, too - but i don't have time.  i don't have a husband and i don't have kids and i don't cook if it requires more than a couple of ingredients, and i'm not a great housekeeper, but i still don't have time.  i am never caught up and i don't know how you women who get caught up do it, and really, i don't want to know, because it makes no nevermind because what works for y'all ain't gonna work for me and i am done with pretending.

so i bought christmas cards today.  well, actually, the ever-wonderful michael bought them for me; i tossed them up on the counter with all the stuff he was buying and lickety split, just like that, they were mine, and i feel gosh darn good about it.  i may go buy another box just in case.  i may buy a christmas present while i'm at it, even though i've been pretending to myself that i will make those also.  (my mother informed me she didn't want anything handmade and she especially didn't want anything with any damn buttons glued to it or sewn on; she'd had enough handmade stuff when she was a child and poor and walked miles and miles to school - which, i have to admit, is true - and she wanted store bought stuff.)

i continue to get lighter.  i remember last year, or maybe a couple of years ago, writing about being tied down to earth and not quite being able to get away, about being tethered, at least i think that's what i wrote, if not i should have, and here i am finally doing it.  it was a slow process getting to this point, but now that i am here, i am dropping things with wild abandon.  perhaps not wild abandon - i can feel y'all rolling your eyes - but i am dropping things and not looking back, at least not much, and for sure with no regrets, with only smiles and a hand over my mouth to contain my laughter.

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10 comments:

  1. now you have to SEND them!! that is the hardest part..i get it ..the whole thing...in fact I should just close my shop all together
    and float away

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  2. Bwah! You made me laugh out loud @ "nothing handmade & especially with buttons on it". It is so funny & poignant how we are often (but not always)formed by the past & our reactions to it.
    Well, honestly, more by our reactions to it...
    And yay & yahoo for dropping things & not looking back!!
    I wonder if there is something in the stars right now? I find myself doing a lot of that right now, also, & without really "trying to".
    It's gonna be a NEW year soon! :-)

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  3. It's funny because each year I plan on making my own christmas cards too . . . haven't made them yet and I've just ended up buying some cards for this year!

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  4. I thought I heard someone giggling...
    I bought my cards back in January for the first time ever, thereby sealing the pact with myself that there would be no making them, and I kept my pact last year to not make any gifts. except for jewelry, of course, most women on my list get some of that :)
    Good for you for the dropping of things and the not looking back.

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  5. i did. i really did hear you laugh as you wrote this post. the smile on your face couldn't contain the little squeaks i heard.....

    i bought cards. and then found some photos from last years storm that i'd forgotten about and now i'm making some cards for the "special people" in my life.

    i think you're special !

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  6. I've been making Christmas cards *and* ornaments for the past 5 years, and it has been exhausting. This year, I made the decision to make only ornaments and buy the darn cards. We'll have to see how it goes...

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  7. I try to make cards each year and this year is no different. I have been saving the brown sleeves they put on my chai at Starbucks and making cards out of the sleeves. I need a few more, so I must also buy another chai when I go to pick up that magazine tomorrow.

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  8. Yeah, I don't have the energy either.

    I make gingerbread men for my students...this takes a long time...and last year I made these wonderful chocolate dipped sugar coated orange peels for my friends and some homemade beaded tree icicles...
    I'm still exhausted from last year. I will be buying my cards too.

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  9. i understand this so well, but one thing i can't let go of is the hand made cards - grew up this way. however i send fewer and fewer each year. i've been making my own cards since i was a child because my mom did. when i was young i made linoleum cut designs, hand stamp each and every one, signed each and every one with more than my name and sent over 50 each year - now I barely get 10 out.
    i'm with you, i don't know how some these women do it.

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