“Do you know," Peter asked, "why swallows build in the eaves of houses? It is to listen to the stories.” ~ J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

8.24.2010

the sun sits upon the grass a bit differently lately

and the hot blue white days of summer will soon be past us; September will usher in a warmer light, the barely beginning of the golden months. It will stay warm here for a while, into October or November - my November birthday doesn't always need a jacket - but it will be autumn nonetheless and the stores will be filled with oranges and yellows and pumpkins and after a bit the leaves will begin to fall, brown and dull at first, then reds and golds and coppers, but even before then, even while it is still summertime hot here, we will have moved into that autumn mindset and all my lovely blues will disappear. I will look hard for them, feeling guilty bypassing the splendor of fall in search of other seasons' frocks. But I will do it. I know myself. I will search for turquoise lights and teal neon signs, for aqua shoes and baby blue tshirts - for blues wherever I can find them. I will miss them, and it will take a while for me to fall in love with autumn. It always does. I am like a child who must put away her favorite lilting summer dress - the one that sings so sweetly of warm breezes and butterflies - and put on a somber brown coat, a coat that hums a harsh tune of hiding away, of dark closets and mothballs. I am already tucking away the memories of blue popsicles and blueberries and I have a new white & blue striped bra to wear as a reminder under coffee colored tshirts. Long sleeved.

But as I said, the sun sits upon the grass a bit differently, it slides across the street at a different angle, and the afternoons already whisper fall. The breezes are unrelentingly hot August breezes, but students trudge by on their way to school each morning, that old autumn ritual just beginning this week; football games will be here any minute, never mind the heat, while I watch baseball, counting down to the days of October, where fall officially begins for me. Somewhere after the World Series and somewhere before the end of Daylight Savings Time, the dark days of fall drop into place and I grow more accepting, lighting candles when I settle in for the night, softer music on the stereo. I almost said "and a cat in front of the fire", but not this year, and I am sad to think that, but it is okay - I have those memories tucked away also.

16 comments:

  1. you breathe poetry and color into the seasons...

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  2. memories that are like the seasons, coming back again and again just when we think we've forgotten them.
    yes, the light changes. even though it is still hot you can sense the difference, although it happens so gradually it takes a while to notice.
    but you made me look forward to cool nights, flannel pjs, candles. i'm not a huge fan of the freezing depths of winter, but I love having seasons that are so distinct, and always looking forward to the next one...

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  3. Oh, Debi, your writing is SO lovely~
    you say what I just smile about. Thank you for the words!!

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  4. I love the thought of you wearing that blue and white bra beneath autumn colored long sleeved shirts, keeping it close to your heart.

    Every season (except winter) I love so much while I am in it, never wanting to let it go. And then the next season arrives and I am in love all over again. But somehow still always wanting the next one and the next, as long as the next one isn't winter.

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  5. I love the early part of autumn, when there's still plenty of light and days that feel like summer in a party dress but wearing a shawl around her shoulders. But most of all, I wanted to tell you that I understand about almost saying what you almost said. I almost bought some dog treats yesterday before I realized that a dog-less house doesn't need them. My cats would not be impressed.

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  6. Emily - You are too kind. If only I could breathe more blue into autumn. :) Thank you.

    Kelly - They seem to come faster every year. :)

    Skye - You are too sweet. Muchas gracias, mi amiga!

    Amy - You made me laugh! As long as it isn't winter. And you up there in cold country. LOL!

    Meri - That's a perfect description; I love that! And the dog treats - it's just heartbreaking sometimes. All those times you did it without thinking, and your brain (and no doubt, your heart) still going there. It's always such a sad awakening.

    xoxo

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  7. my windows are open tonight and i can't tell you the last time they were...

    fall is slithering its way here, too....

    and i like it.....mostly.

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  8. it might sound odd but having been away for half the summer (even though it was summer where we were) I feel as though i missed it. I am not ready to give in to falling leaves and cooler air and the wearing of socks.
    :-)
    xo

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  9. Oh what a beautiful read... We never had much of a summer this year...quite chilly. Just this past week it got hot. I too will miss the light blues and greens of summer. I was sad looking at the Halloween displays today... I am not ready yet.

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  10. thank you for your words, debi. autumn is my favorite but i will also miss the torquoise and some special souls gone to me this year...but like you said--we have the memories tucked away. xoxo

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  11. this is pure poetry to read. the light does play different these days even though it is brutally hot. i love that i live in an area that gets distinct seasons - each having a span of time that is just right to me - none to long or short.
    i'm feeling that hint of fall here too and i'm just about ready to accept it with welcome arms

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  12. i like the way this feels my friend down the road ....i have a hard time with the transition as well but you say it with words that touch my heart...took my baby to Austin College in Sherman today...

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  13. Oh, I love the fall! I am so happy it is September...and will be even more excited when October 1st rolls around.
    I get this post though...but for me it seems to be happening around Christmas. I don't look for the greens and reds and golds...I seek out silvers and soft greens and blues. Just over the past several years, my tastes have been changing.

    Ok, enough talk about Christmas. yikes.
    I am basking in the beginning days of fall.

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  14. You are such a summer baby. I love that about you.


    Me? I am fall and winter and spring. I have found much to love about summer, but I am always, always happy to move past it. I long for autumn in ways I never long for any other season. I ache for her crispness. For apples and crunch and trees in their ballgowns.

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