“Do you know," Peter asked, "why swallows build in the eaves of houses? It is to listen to the stories.” ~ J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

12.26.2009

A Dream of Arizona

Back to Earth we fall.
Hopefully gently.

It is over at last, this season I shouldn't be so happy to see gone, but the truth be the truth, and it was a hard autumn, and I don't even know if technically we are into winter yet, but that just illustrates the toughness of these past few months. The last of the gifts are gone - no, there is still one, I just remembered - but the craziness is gone and 2010 is visible from the front door. It's still blurry, still at a distance, but it holds promises and surprises and hopefully a better mood and begins with a blue moon; a good sign, that blue, at least for me.

I dreamed of Arizona last night - I dreamed I was back, on a trip with blogging friends; I heard my name called and turning around, I saw Soozi, an old high school friend, and off I went with her to relive old times. She was a writer, she said, and we drove to her house, the living room painted dark pink, yellow light from a lamp casting an orange circle behind it. We cried and cried to see each other again, and the dream seemed to go on forever. I think of her a lot, she is one of those images that stay in my mind without thinking, I see her standing in our high school courtyard, black top, gypsy skirt, knitted orange cap over curly, curly hair. It is a faded image, but I see it nonetheless. I don't know why I am even mentioning it, but the dream stays in my head this morning, a dream of warmth, of friendships old and new, a dream full of the Arizona sky. Perhaps in looking forward, I look back also, perhaps it is a goodbye. I have made a decision - I laugh at what a hard decision it has been - to buy a new address book, to keep the old one in a drawer, the one with Soozi's number, the one full of my past, full of numbers no longer needed or wanted, full of memories good and bad. A beginning of a new life, the past still with me, making me who I am, but behind me. Clean pages awaiting; the new year seems like a good time to begin.
this past week, i have learned that phones lose information

7 comments:

  1. You are a good writer. I am happy to find you from tangobaby.

    ReplyDelete
  2. A dream of Arizona skies...sigh...

    I like that you see a new beginning. Putting the past away and starting fresh. No, not forgetting, but moving forward. Free.

    Blessings to you in 2010.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh. Wow. I still have the address book I bought in 1979 and every one I've bought since then. Just can't throw them away. Happy Happy 2010!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. A powerful dream. Seems prophetic.
    And the image? Stunning. Absolutely stunning. It goes with your writing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. powerful memories here...amid the fallen gold

    ReplyDelete
  6. I've been thinking a lot about old friends, too. One lives only a few hours away, and I wonder whether or not to contact her. What if the magic is gone? What if all my wonderful memories of the perfect best friend are replaced with uncomfortable moments with this person I know longer know and hardly recognize?

    ReplyDelete
  7. Here's to new beginnings.
    A new life.
    A new clean page.
    So much hope for a new year ahead.

    ReplyDelete

come. sit under the emma tree & let's talk. i have cookies . . .