“Do you know," Peter asked, "why swallows build in the eaves of houses? It is to listen to the stories.” ~ J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

6.23.2009

In which I admit : I am not a peachy girl

The view from my bedroom window has always been blue.

A gray-blue, sometimes a blue-gray, but it has been there for all the years I have been here. A pleasant out-of-focus pale blueness below the sky, a background for the white dogwood & white azaleas peeping at me over the vine covered fence. But nothing is permanent, and it is changing, that house soon to be pink, in fact already halfway there, brick by brick shedding her blue dress for this new pink frock, and if it were a pink I liked- if it were a baby-girl pale pink or a pink with blues lurking as undertones - how much happier I would feel. But it is a peach pink, a light orangey pink, and it feels like yet another change to my neighborhood, another shift in the energy, and I am unsure about this, about this color so near, the back of that garage only 10 feet from one of my bedroom windows. It will change the color of the light in my house, reflecting warm peachiness back towards me, and it will mean that the window I see from this very couch will soon be a pinky-peach rectangle demanding my attention instead of a neutral grayness blending with the outdoors. It is a perfectly fine color, and I apologize to those of you who may have homes the very same shade of pink, but I wonder why-oh-why it couldn't be a cooler pink. I tell myself it is the color of a Creamsicle or Dreamsicle or an orange push-up - and it is - and I am trying to think of it as such, but so far I am failing. I like my windows open, the light of the day pouring in, but now my house - yes, it is a small place, quite open, so yes, my entire house will clash with this rectangle soon to appear, and I am a person who searches stores for white toothbrushes, and complains about the colors of razors (why only colors for teenagers, why no colors to "match" the bathroom of a grown woman?). I am the person who cries when shopping for a new hairdryer because the colors are hideous, and even when I find a white one, it inevitably will have a black cord, which is quite horrible actually, and you can't just put it away - you have to wait until it cools, and if, like me, you use it a lot, it means it's always out, and oh, I know I'm neurotic about all this, and thank God the ever-wonderful Michael will change cords out for me rather than put up with my tears, but this peachiness just seems like yet another sign from the Universe telling me to move. The painter said the color is coral something or other, then added but really it is peach, and I asked him if he could conjure up some magic and make the back of the garage more bluey-pink. He just laughed and will no doubt tell the house's owner, who I really like but am not close to, and I feel uncomfortable about that, but it is what it is, and this color is just not me. And so. Peach. I will have to get used to it, and who knows (she says hopefully but with great doubt) - perhaps I will learn to like it.

It is the color of the desert at the end of the day;
I will try to remember that.
sigh, she says, but not the color i want

8 comments:

  1. you can do it...i love peach...it will be a special light! your comments mean the world to me by the way...

    ReplyDelete
  2. elk - Oh, I don't think I can. The garage was painted today & I was just home, and it felt so much worse than I'd thought it would. I couldn't stop peeking out of the corner of my eye toward that peachy light! LOL! We will see. Surely I will get used to it!

    :) Debi

    And PS - Thank you!

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  3. I am sorry Debi...sorry that I am giggling at this...and yet, I understand your pain a bit too well. Our first home was a tiny little dollhouse of a cottage that we painted a pretty blue-grey...the new owners have since painted it lavender, lime green, and a neon lemon yellow. I will confess to you that I am not a peachy girl either...nor am I a lemon yellow/lime gree girl.

    There's just no accounting for taste. :-)

    Good luck with the peach...

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  4. You know what? I think you are finding signs all over the place of what you know in your heart already.

    Still...

    Just in case. Maybe you can think Dreamsicles, orange sherbet, desert skies, peach slices dipped in icing sugar, a perfect sunrise...

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  5. Celeste - Oh, no, I am glad you laughed! It's funny. I laughed when I wrote it because it's so absurd. I also remember a friend who used to live in that house, back when it was still blue - she was from Jakarta and the furnishings were calming, and we would sit on the porch & eat bowls of homegrown tomatoes or strawberries. My mother's cat was rescued from under that house - just a wee thing, needing a home. So many memories. None of them peach. :)

    Relyn - You are so right. I know this in my heart - a move is in the future, and I know it cannot occur until Maggie is gone, and it feels like the Universe is rushing me towards that end. But also, just the constant, ongoing changes - my mother has been dealing with a heart situation for a couple of weeks, seemingly with no relief, pointing her in the direction of a short hospital stay, and it feels like more stuff being rushed at me. I know I must go, I feel it, and would that I had enough money to pick the perfect place I want (which, coincidentally, is for sale) - things would feel differently. I would not feel pushed into it; I would feel destined for it. Ah well, I am rattling. In the meantime, Dreamsicles & sunsets. Thank you.

    :) Debi

    ReplyDelete
  6. i'm not a peachy girl either, so this made me laugh a little. houses aren't supposed to be the color of a dreamsicle if you ask me. and the razor colors - i'm with you on those things. I'd much prefer my bathroom items to be white.

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  7. i am not peachy at all either!

    perhaps you could swoosh a
    few subltle streaks of a little
    something something in there
    when no one is looking

    that said

    you are so right

    it is the color of the desert at the
    end of the day

    and that makes all the difference:)

    ReplyDelete
  8. This is the color of my parents house. They were going for a tropical feel. Not my color either, I'm a blue, violet, purple, teal, turquoise kind of girl. Maybe you will be inspired by the different light coming into the house???

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