“Do you know," Peter asked, "why swallows build in the eaves of houses? It is to listen to the stories.” ~ J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan


Hither & yon

See those 2 hands?
The ones holding on for dear life?
Connected to someone who's being thrown hither & yon?

Hither & yon. Hither & yon. Hither & yon. Faster & faster, this way & that, back again to the same spot - wait! wasn't I here already? Why I am here again? - wait! - now I'm not there - wait, I need a break! - wait, this is too fast, too high, too, too, too low! - I 'm going to fly through that fence! But wait! I'm back to this spot again!

I'm having one of those days. I just want it to slow down - I want to just say "Wait!", and like when EF Hutton talks, I want things to stop! Just stop. Just for a few moments. Let me catch my breath! Because I should care about an employee's broken foot, should care that this means someone will have to be hired as his temporary assistant - someone to haul camera equipment & lights - and mentally I do - I do care- but emotionally I can't muster up the emotion. I am full already - there is no more room. I am cared out.

When I look again at the above image, I notice that that person doesn't seem to really be holding on all that tight. I think to myself that I should've chosen a picture with the little car flying out of the picture - that would be more illustrative of my feelings today. But then I think that maybe the not holding on so tight is the remedy - maybe my muse/guardian angel chose this picture, maybe I had nothing to do with it - maybe because I'm supposed to notice that those hands are actually having fun. Despite all the hither & yons. Maybe because of the hither & yons.

Because yes, I'm admitting it now, days are full of hithers & yons. And yes, some of those yons are pretty scary, pretty aggravating or annoying, but there's always that hither bringing me back. Always. No thing is permanent, said the Buddha. So I will try to remember that today is this ride - one I'm not particularly crazy about - but tomorrow may be that lovely, slow, stars overhead, nighttime Ferris wheel, or a carousel with a giant sky-blue giraffe waiting for me to climb on board, or maybe even bumper cars.

I'm thinking today would be a great day for bumper cars.
jane, how do you stop this crazy thing?


  1. Yes, some yons are terrifying. But no matter how radical they feel, they always seem to pass. And finding ways to cope and keep moving forward in spite of the wildest yons is where it's at, I think ...

  2. Jenny - Yes. We have to just stay on the ride.

    Today's ride feels like an old rickety roller coaster that is barely making it up the inclines & just gliding somewhat slowly back down. Not scary at all, thank goodness.

    :) Debi

  3. Hang in there! How boring would life be without the crazy parts?

    Who am I kidding... I much prefer the ferris wheel days myself. But, too many of them would get rather uninteresting, don't you think? ;)

    I'll race you to the bumper cars!


  4. Jaime - Aren't bumper cars just TOO much fun? We should have a blogger/bumper car party! I wonder if we can do that in some sort of cyber way? LOL!

    :) Debi

  5. that is a truly great metaphoric photo debi! and i did notice the person wasn't gripping the bar with all that much intensity. it does help to loosen the grip a little. i know you know that :) but it is hard isn't it? XO

    i am visiting your most recent post so i can keep up. if i start where i left off then i am always missing out on your most immediate story and i want to be in the thick of it right along with you!

    i'm glad today is a little better for you. it is frustrating that the universe just doesn't listen when we asked nicely for it to slow the hell up!

    you know me... your post brought back a memory.... my sister cheryl was here for a visit a number of years ago and we decided to go o the fair. i have always loved rides, the tilt-o-whirl in particular. wow! talk about hither and yon!! woo hoo! but anyway we passed up the tilt-o-whirl and headed for the double decker ferris wheel. it was one of those one's where you spin around upside down as well and flow along in a big circle/spiral... we though we were smart alecks and brave and all that.. so we get on the ride... and it starts spinning.. and all of a sudden we are UPSIDE DOWN!!! yes really and you know what?

    i started screaming bloody murder. i mean screaming at the top of my voice! i meant it. i was saying STOP! STOP! i want to get off! and the worker on the ferris wheel made us go around a couple of more times while i continued to scream and he finally realized i wasn't going to 'adjust.'

    so he disgustedly stopped the entire ride and let us off. it was embarrassing but necessary.

    Jenny doh visited! good! i think she would love your work for her magazine :)

  6. I read your mail, my heart shouted yes and my fingers relaxed.

  7. Maybe it would be a good day for bumper cars, or maybe we would all just explode.

  8. Robin - Oh Lordy. Doesn't it just feel like FOREVER when you're on a ride & you WANT TO GET OFF? And you're powerless!! Well, except for lung power, I guess! :)

    Hele - There's lot to be said for relaxing our fingers. And funny how difficult such a small act can be. Thank you!

    Cookie - Girl, you are crazy! And probably right! But I have no doubt it would be a BEAUTIFUL explosion!!

    Love, Debi

  9. I love those little hands. I think because I like this ride (I forget what it's called) that I assumed the person attached to the hands was having fun.

    Our little roller coaster ride through life can't help but whip us around sometimes. The nice thing to know is that with the ride comes in a place where there is cotton candy and games and music. So overall, it's good.

    I hope things are better for you now.

  10. Tango - You have a much stronger stomach than I! LOL!

    And yes, things are better. Thanks for checking in!

    :) Debi


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